Finding Comfort- Session #2

Comfort is so important in life, even through life's hardships. Do you have something that you carry with you that makes you feel safe and at home, especially if home has always been a place where you rest and restore yourself? Whether it‘s permitting yourself to sit on the couch and watch the latest football games, or feeling like Bonnie when she saw Woody for the first time in Toy Story, we all have something that allows us to reduce our need to be overstimulated by everything. As we age, we often forget the things that once brought us comfort and joy. The things that gave us a sense of understanding through situations where we didn’t know how we were going to overcome them.

Clients come into the space trying to figure out what provides them a sense of joy; what are the things they cling to to deal with life's challenges? Often, they forget about the things that helped them cope healthily in the past, even though they have grown older and life becomes a little more challenging. Without identifying the things that make you comfortable, you live in a state of discomfort and are unsure what you need to feel better about a situation. There will never be a point in your life where you stop finding ways to cope; you’ll always need to figure out what people, places, and things make you comfortable.

We all have needs.

Clients are using multiple parts of their brain by trying to communicate how they are feeling emotionally, while also finding a rhythm that doesn’t increase their anxiety or make them overthink what they're saying. So it’s essential to find strategies to cope with those feelings and thoughts in session.

Here are a few ways that you can comfort yourself when you are in therapy: 

Bring your fidget toys! It doesn't matter what your age is, but if you feel like a toy can help you regulate and reduce stress in your space, you should use it! Sometimes, a therapist may provide them, but if you already have something to fidget with when you are in the space, it’s essential to have that with you. I’m not distracted by those because it’s what’s going to make you feel important in the space.

If the therapist has adjustable lights, let them know your preference for dimming or brightening them. My office has the option to adjust the lighting, which makes a significant difference in how clients perceive the space. Those lights can set the tone based on how a client is feeling.

Bring some coffee or hot tea to the session. I’m okay with your bringing that into the session, especially when it comes to reducing stress levels and allowing your body to relax in the way you need to. Although each therapist is different, incorporating those behaviors can be helpful for you as you discuss your story. 

Many methods can provide you with comfort, even if you don’t think that is acceptable in the space. Try not to make assumptions but ask the therapist, whether it’s before the session or during. Have a conversation with your therapist to discuss your preferences for the session and determine if it will work for you.

Let’s talk about therapy comfort next time!